Thinking out loud

 https://youtu.be/uy7ZRRDkWw4?si=mXc3jNyaqFzQhc7S Listen to   Tchaikovsky, Pyotr Ilyich: The Seasons, Op. 37a No. 6 June "Barcarolle " 17 years after the events in my life happened, I've red Feodor Dostoyevsky's White Nights and realised a number of similarities to my own experiences: 1 main character outright describes himself as a dreamer. I was a dreamer, both in my own head and by any independent view of my thoughts at the time 2 main male character meets the main female character Nastenka on the anniversary of 1 year of her love story. I first talked to mine on her 2 year anniversary of her love story.  3 Both myself and the main character were warned about falling in love with the main female character. Ok, I wasn't forbidden to do that, but close enough  4 In both stories the main female character gets very excited on the sight of her original love interest to the point of completely loosing sight of the other person by their side (this one was the trigger ...

 She says Pablo Alboran Perodname He answers with Pablo Alborán - Si hubieras querido  I spent 17.5 years thinking I failed because she didn't love me. Because she didn't love me how I dreamed I wanted to be loved.  But even after she made it (painfully) clear I wasn't to be the father of her children, she still wanted to be around me. She still wanted to make me better, as I also wanted the same for her, to make her be the best version of herself possible.  What is love if it's not wanting all the best for the other person? If love is being so altruistic that the other person's happiness comes before yours, that you are happy they have found their better half, then it was love. It wasn't what I wanted, but she was honestly happy for me and I was happy for her, than that makes it love.